Tasting menus at Michelin Restaurants - Moments in Barcelona

They say never say never so I won't.

What I will say is that I will most likely not go through the gastronomic version of a Stalinist North Korean march and parade that we call a tasting menu ever again.

Mind you like hangovers and some say childbirth, 

I have said this before,
 but forgot the digestive drudgery and booked a table at the Moments Restaurant on my recent trip to Barcelona.

But I made an exception because Barcelona has a foodie culture and I thought I might experience something different than that from other restaurants elsewhere.

This is nothing against this restaurant that has two Michelin stars nor is this a review specifically on this establishment which was rather pleasant in itself.

Long time readers will know that the only other time 

I wrote about a tasting menu was the one I had at Noma in Copenhagen which is considered the #1 restaurant in the world.

The tome that my husband is flipping through isn't the latest government tax laws and codes but the wine list.  

I am not that into wines and I really only have it for effect. 

I find that not having wine is the foodie version of someone wearing a huge puffer jacket in front of a roaring fire - 

people will constantly comment and ask if you are okay. 

Gets rather boring.

One of my best friends was a chef in the top restaurants in Melbourne and she has always told me that the best value is to get the tasting menus as the amount of work and the ingredients is almost at cost.  

These restaurants make their money - if at all - on alcohol.

El Bulli which was always voted the number one or at worst number two restaurant before it shut never made any profit in all!

I do as I am told so we decided to do a world gastronomic tasting menu which I was a little disappointed with as 

I wanted a Spanish / Catalan menu but it's not always about me.

The most Spanish dish I got was the anchovy with strawberry puree on toast.

This dumpling was very good but I can get that 5 minutes from my house.

I don't eat foie gras anymore but I made an exception and tried the macaroom with foie, apple, celery and armagnac.

You know how couture of food and fashion filters down - well get ready for your nearest deli to do ham and cheese macaroons.

They then brought out a freshly baked loaf of bread and sliced us a piece but without any oil or butter. It just seems disjointed but 

I rarely say no to food.  

But this made my husband question why this arbitrary loaf of bread was presented.

It was handy for sopping up the remains of this Spanish stew.

The prawn with zucchini and a saffron jellied medallion with basil sauce was nice.

But I won't dedicate a poem to it or anything.

The dish that was to transplant us to Turkey was a hors d'oeuvre sized gyro / souvlaki.

But oddly it tasted just like a miniature version of a really good regular one.

There was nothing that was elevated for a Michelin restaurant bar the portion on the pretty dollops of sauce around it. I was disappointed at their lack of high brow interpretation.

I started to wonder if the chefs have travelled and been to a cocktail party in America where these sliders are the norm. 

Only thing I didn't mind was the fondant potato French fry with pretty colored savoury sauces squeezed on top. Much ado about nothing and in a blind test McDonalds's chips would have won.

The token Japanese dish was nice but it was like wet falafel.

Okay not I am not being rude.

I must repeat I am not being odd but this next dish is a Thai dish called Clitoria Thai rice, monkfish and coconut.

If you don't believe me, look at the menu they handed out above.

Ping pong ball was not included.

Most disappointing dish was this duck and friend veggie tempura dish.

I have had better fried veggies at Japanese airports.

The ode to England was the Stilton, pear, and almonds.

But this dish depends on produce and raw ingredients not the skill so while nice I want to eat something at a restaurant I can't recreate myself.

By this time, my husband and I were experiencing so much discomfort and we were having a hard time not commiting the social faux pas of elbows on tables because we wanted to bury our face in our hands.

But as I am getting bolshier as I get older, I had to apologize to our waiters and ask them to skip the next two dessert courses.

This was turning out to be one of those unsuccessful Man v Food episodes.

She then said that we should have a light portion of a refreshing and digestive that was a vodka cocktail.  
We both enjoyed the theatrics.

But I liked the flamingo swizzle sticks more.

Then as we asked for the bill, we forgot about the petit fours that are de riguer.

Except in this case, the petit fours were humongous four cookies!

From left to right was a coconut cookie, white chocolate evil eye, chocolate cookie, and a ganache shaped like the Eiffel Tower.

Normally I would have devoured this but all we could do was take pictures and tell the waiters to convey to the chef how amazing everything was.

Even though I missed out on Miami and Marrakech stop on the tasting menu, I still got the stamp in my passport!

But the next morning at breakfast,
 I turned to my husband and said that unless circumstances dictate otherwise that I never want to do another tasting menu again and 
I think us both agreeing to this just saved our marriage!