Wednesday, 13 April 2016

Chairs and Their Anthropomorphic Personas - Part 1


I'm a homo sapien so I can't help but have the tendency to anthropomorphize objects.

I do this with clothes, art, and furniture.

Plus I like making scenarios up in my head which I do all the time while waiting for things so I did this while scrolling on Pinter-est.

You may not like these chairs but you know these chairs.

1950's Emerald Velvet Armchair
Via
The high functioning alcoholic.


Retro Vintage 50's Armchair
Via
This chair is like that friend you have a mundane conversation with almost everyday about what you ate and what you dreamed about last night.
This is nourishment in minutiae but non-negotiable.


The Midas Chair
Via
This chair is like that friend you made at work 3 jobs ago but there is less and less you have to talk about every time you meet up once a season and now you repeat the same old anecdotes.
Might be time to just like each others' posts on Facebook and leave it at that.



Upcycled Suitcase as Chair
Via
This chair is that smug, suburban friend you have who always thinks they came up with something new but is so Martha Stewart Living 2006.
She also starts every other sentence with,"You are never going to believe this!"


Fur upholstered director's chair
Via
This chair is like that person who says that they are so chilled out and so relaxed and they are so zen and that yoga has changed their life but they freak out that there is lemon instead of lime in their room temperature,crystal infused, new moon marinated Emoto water.


The Bright Floral Upholstered Louis Something or rather Armchair
Via
This chair reminds me of the person who gets all the initial attention when you walk into a restaurant, club, and past the building site but never gets called for the second date.


Edwardian Chippendale style chair
Via
This chair embodies the curmudgeon.
This chair wouldn't use a mobile phone unless it's an emergency. They hate the internet and thinks it is a conspiracy for Big Brother to track your every move and will ultimately be the downfall for the human race that most likely deserves it anyway.
And they are probably right.



Quaker Farmchair
Not necessarily the best value at dinner parties nor are they your most amusing friend but they are the ones who will bring you soup if you are ill, they are the ones who actually answers the phone, and they always keep your extra set of house keys safe.

Whether you liked it or not, you are getting a part 2 next month!

49 comments:

  1. Ha ha, love your descriptions!!

    xoxo
    Karena
    The Arts by Karena

    ReplyDelete
  2. this post is great. Looking forward to part 2. Den x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There really are so many chairs like people types Den! x

      Delete
  3. I can't wait for the overly dramatic friend or the one who thinks the are your friend,,,but they're really not. Ooooh, what's your take on the lazy boy recliner?

    ReplyDelete
  4. If I send pictures of chairs, will you describe them?
    Karen

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Karen, if you are willing and I feel inspired then I just might - but this is a bit like psychic reading so I might get nothing at all! ;)

      Delete
  5. Very funny! I love the high functioning alcoholic chair myself - looks very comfy.
    I also once had a skirt made out of that Louis chair flower fabric. It's a very nice embroidered fabric. Made a good skirt, bit much on a chair though. xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Very comfy after two drinks but awkward after 5!
      The fabric is lovely but it is a bit one hit wonder for a chair? xx

      Delete
  6. This post madre me simile, The best thing to begin the day witg. Can't wait for The second part

    ReplyDelete
  7. I think that my chairs represent the type of person who never goes out to buy chairs, but just makes do with whatever gravitates his way. I also have a pair of dour, sharp-edged ancestors, but to balance these a more genial, sturdy bamboo-blond friendly type.
    --Jim
    PS--The Curmudgeon chair is correct about the internet--in fact, it's even worse than he thinks!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ha Jim! My chairs are a bit worrying now that I look at it - but I make do you see and I am to scared to delve hehe

      Delete
  8. Ok, so I actually like the poppy fabric on your Louis Whatsy chair!

    May the Chair Be With You.

    Takes my mind off Old Kate's Indian tour frocks x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gotta say that the new yet ol' couple ain't making the headlines even on the daily mail - would love to workshop all that with you!! x

      Delete
  9. Love it! I might well see myself in part two of your study of chairs!

    SSG xxx

    ReplyDelete
  10. So funny. Hehe I'm going to look at the chairs around my house differently today. XO

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But remember your chairs don't reflect you though hehe xx

      Delete
  11. if I were a chair I think I'd be an emerald lacquered Chinese Chippendale with a white patent leather seat. As in you love it at first and then it grates on your nerves quickly and becomes overwhelming. I am nothing if not self aware.
    More chairs tomorrow please I don't want to wait. If you lived in the US I would make a Dawson's Creek reference here. I know genius can't be rushed but rush.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. HAHAHAHAA! I'd buy that chair and show it off for a while and stick you back up for auction only to be stored away but then fifty years later you become a collectors and you are then saved from a life of being suffocated with dirty laundry then to the double edge sword of life in an ivory tower sectioned off in a museum.

      SAJ - I would for you but I am out tonight but maybe I can do a token one chair - compromise is key!

      Delete
  12. Aah, I like it and am waiting for part two!I wonder what's to come. I'm the quaker armchair sort of person - I've got one.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sturdy reliable and never out of fashion :)

      Delete
  13. I LOVE this!!! I'd like to motion that Emoto Water crowd over to the electric chair.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Oh my gawd! :) I think I know someone like that Louis floral chair :)
    Too fun!
    xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  15. I do like quirky furniture, that upcycled suitcase chair is a gem! Happy weekend xx

    ReplyDelete
  16. I rather like the Midas chair. It sort of says " sit for just a bit & then, move on. It's visually appealing, but will never be your best friend.
    Glad to know someone else has a tendency to anthropomorphise furniture.
    Great selection of chairs & their personalities!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Hilarious. Love the high functioning alcoholic green one. Looking forward to your comments on Le Corb chaise longue, etc. In Sri Lanka they used to have cane chairs that bit you (well the cane bugs did). Often in doctors' waiting rooms. Then there are the ones with backs that suddenly give way behind you. You think it's just a normal chair and lean back a little, next thing you're almost prone in a split second. There was one like this at Parliament House in one of the Committee rooms. Quickly learned which one to avoid - but it did enliven meetings when a person rushed in late and threw themselves into it and then gave out a low scream as they hurtled backwards. Funny how the maintenance people never seemed to fix it! Pammie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahahaha! So funny!

      Delete
  18. Such a great post. I like the emerald chair and I will leave it at that. Ha. Can't wait for part two! xx

    ReplyDelete
  19. Being a scarf and chair lover that I am, many years ago, I bought a Gucci scarf that has many chairs printed on it. How I wish I have the time to upload an well-constructed image of the said scarf - Italian furniture is tops in my books!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I adore Italian furniture too so I'm biased so can't look at it with the analytics.

      Delete
  20. I love that plush emerald green, reminds me so much of British styling, my friend had a bathroom in that color and it was stunning

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You lived in London so that chair is very London!

      Delete
  21. You are hilarious! The high functioning alcoholic: *snort*. And the suburban smug chair made me laugh out loud. This is a coffee table book in the making, my friend.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad you have a warped sense of humour like me!

      Delete
  22. This is hilarious and has me looking at my chairs. I think I have a couple of fat disapproving old matrons in the family room. They’re looking down their noses at my faux zebra rug. Waiting for second edition! Tonkath

    ReplyDelete
  23. I love the vintage 50's one. I would be the floral pink Louis armchair, but something that pretty should get a second date! I have a small fading brown velvet boudior chair in my bedroom that belonged to my mother, I'm thinking of a character for it now!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh yes but life is funny like that right?

      Delete

Thank you for dropping by!